Introduction
We all feel fed up, miserable or sad at times. These
feelings don't usually last longer than a week or
two, and they don't interfere too much with our
lives. Sometimes there's a reason, sometimes not. We
usually cope - we may talk to a friend but don't
otherwise need any help.
However, in depression:
What does it feel like?
Most people with depression will not have all the
symptoms listed below, but most will have at least
five or six.
You:
-
feel unhappy most of the time
(but may feel a little better in the evenings)
-
lose interest in life and
can't enjoy anything
-
find it harder to make
decisions
-
can't cope with things that
you used to
-
feel utterly tired
-
feel restless and agitated
-
lose appetite and weight
(some people find they do the reverse and put on
weight)
-
take 1-2 hours to get off to
sleep, and then wake up earlier than usual
-
lose interest in sex
-
lose your self-confidence
-
feel useless, inadequate and
hopeless
-
avoid other people
-
feel irritable
-
feel worse at a particular
time each day, usually in the morning
-
think of suicide.
You may not realise how depressed you are for a
while, especially if it has come on gradually. You
try to struggle on and may even start to blame
yourself for being lazy or lacking willpower. It
sometimes takes a friend or a partner to persuade
you that there really is a problem which can be
helped.
You may start to notice pains, constant headaches or
sleeplessness. Physical symptoms like this can be
the first sign of depression.
Why does it happen?
As with our everyday feelings of low mood, there
will sometimes be an obvious reason for becoming
depressed, sometimes not. It can be a
disappointment, a frustration, or that you have lost
something - or someone important to you. There is
often more than one reason, and these will be
different for different people. They include:
-
Things that happen in our lives
It is normal to feel depressed after a distressing
event - bereavement, a divorce or losing a job. You
may well spend a lot of time over the next few weeks
or months thinking and talking about it. After a
while you come to terms with what's happened. But
you may get stuck in a depressed mood, which doesn't
seem to lift.
If you are alone, have no friends around, are
stressed, have other worries or are physically run
down, you are more likely to become depressed.
Physical illnesses can affect the way the brain
works and so cause depression. These include:
-
life-threatening illnesses
like cancer and heart disease
-
long and/or painful
illnesses, like arthritis
-
viral infections like 'flu'
or glandular fever - particularly in younger
people
-
hormonal problems, like an
under-active thyroid.
Some of us seem to be more vulnerable to depression
than others. This may be because of our genes,
because of experiences early in our life, or both.
Regular heavy drinking makes you more likely to get
depressed and, indeed, to kill yourself.
Women seem to get depressed more often than men. It
may be that men are less likely to talk about their
feelings, and more likely to deal with them by
drinking heavily or becoming aggressive. Women are
more likely to have the double stress of having to
work and look after children.
Depression can run in families. If you have one
parent who has become severely depressed, you are
about eight times more likely to become depressed
yourself.
What about bipolar disorder (manic depression)?
About one in 10 people who suffer from serious
depression will also have periods when they are too
happy and overactive. This used to be called manic
depression, but is now often called Bipolar
Disorder. It affects the same number of men and
women and tends to run in families (see leaflet
on Bipolar Disorder).
Isn't depression just a form of weakness?
Other people may think that you have just 'given
in', as if you have a choice in the matter. The fact
is there comes a point at which depression is much
more like an illness than anything else. It can
happen to the most determined of people even
powerful personalities can experience deep
depression. Winston Churchill called it his black
dog'.
When should I seek help?
-
When your feelings of
depression are worse than usual and don't seem
to get any better.
-
When your feelings of
depression affect your work, interests and
feelings towards your family and friends.
-
If you find yourself feeling
that life is not worth living, or that other
people would be better off without you.
It may be enough to talk things over with a relative
or friend. If this doesn't help, you probably need
to talk it over with your GP. You may find that your
friends and family have noticed a difference in you
and have been worried about you.
Helping yourself
-
Don't keep it to yourself
If you've had some bad news, or a major upset, tell
someone close to you - tell them how you feel. You
may need to talk (and maybe cry) about it more than
once. This is part of the mind's natural way of
healing.
Get out of doors for some exercise, even if only for
a walk. This will help you to keep physically fit,
and will help you sleep. Even if you can't work,
it's good to keep active. This could be housework,
do-it-yourself (even as little as changing a light
bulb), or any activity that is part of your normal
routine.
You may not feel like eating - but try to eat
regularly. Depression can make you lose weight and
run short of vitamins which will only make you feel
worse. Fresh fruit and vegetables are particularly
helpful.
Try not to drown your sorrows with a drink. Alcohol
actually makes depression worse. It may make you
feel better for a short while, but it doesn't last.
Drinking can stop you dealing with important
problems and from getting the right help. It's also
bad for your physical health.
If you can't sleep, try not to worry about it.
Settle down with some relaxing music or television
while you're lying in bed. Your body will get a
chance to rest and, with your mind occupied, you may
feel less anxious and find it easier to get some
sleep.
If you think you know what is behind your
depression, it can help to write down the problem
and then think of the things you could do to tackle
it. Pick the best things to do and try them.
Remind yourself that:
-
Many other people have had
depression.
-
It may be hard to believe,
but you will eventually come out of it.
-
Depression can sometimes be
helpful you may come out of it stronger and
better able to cope. It can help you to see
situations and relationships more clearly.
-
You may be able to make
important decisions and changes in your life,
which you have avoided in the past.
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